Two Good Eggs

Two cracked eggs find the sunnyside (and funny side) of trying to conceive

Product Review: Pre-seed. Holy Tsunami, Batman.

on September 18, 2012

We’ve all heard it:  “Trying to get pregnant is the fun part!”

This almost always comes out of the mouths of friends who got pregnant within the first month or so of trying.  Whenever you’ve been TTC for 6 months, a year, or longer, it’s a different story.  It goes more like this:


           G’night.  Oh crap.  Is tonight an “on” night?

Sigh.  Is it?  It is.


Sigh.  Ok.

When the mood in the bedroom becomes more like that of a dentist office, it’s virtually impossible to get the juices flowing.  Even with “optimal fertile cervical mucus” on the inside, the outside doesn’t always get the memo.

And, through research and good old trial and error, you learn all the things that damage those little male carriers.  KY Jelly.  Lotion.  Astroglide.  Saliva.  Soap (don’t judge me for liking some shower fun!).  And then, like a beacon of light from the gates to Heaven, you see that cute little white box sitting alone amidst the more popular varieties.  The one that offers “Seriously fun baby-making!”   Pre-seed.

Sure, let’s give it a try.

Holy tsunami, Batman.

Quick word of advice – a little dab’ll do ya.  This stuff multiplies like a Gremlin in water.  Once it’s on, it’s free flowing, kids.

Now, onto the review:

First, this is the woman’s answer to foreplay.  Especially on those rare occasions when a roadmap could be useful.  Instead of having to hone in on the exact target, this wonder gel makes contact in the general vicinity light you up like a Christmas tree.  Score 1 for Preseed.

Second, this is a neon “Welcome” sign for your vajayjay.  DH got in, got out, and went home (or, to sleep, as it were).  No long, drawn out sessions on a weeknight makes this appealing, especially for those of us who prop our hips on a pillow for half an hour post-coitus.  Score 2 for Preseed.

Third, it’s odorless and not sticky!  Score 3 for Preseed.

Finally, this added boost allegedly makes a little Gulf Stream for the boys to make it quickly and safely to the cervix.  As I am still waiting for an egg to appear on my chart before I can even enter the TWW, the verdict is still out here.  But I have no reason to think it didn’t help.

I don’t consider these to be negatives, because I love this product already.  But, a few considerations:

  1. The syringes are interesting.  They go up to 5 grams, but given that I only used 1.5grams and slept in a puddle of love juice all night, I don’t know what kind of cavernous vajayjay would need all 5g in one shot.  In fact, you can probably forego the internal application, unless you just want that added gulf stream up in there to transport the boys faster.  I may opt for only half a gram next time.
  2. It’s a little pricey.  For $21.99 a tube, this stuff should be made of gold.  Then again, if it helps get the job done and produce a little bambino, then it is gold to me.
  3. It truly does create a vaginal tsunami.  And, as one who despises laying in the snail trail of love after our work is done, this wasn’t a fun way to wake up at 3am upon rolling over and feeling myself expel the fluid that had been on lock down for the previous three hours.    However, if that’s the only drawback, well, I’ll happily put on a panty liner and hit snooze.

Once we ever hit the Baby Jackpot, I definitely see Preseed securing a long-term place in our night table drawer.  And I may mark out their tagline and pencil in my own – Seriously Fun Booty Shakin’.

4 responses to “Product Review: Pre-seed. Holy Tsunami, Batman.

  1. […] already told you about my baby-making lab – the OPKs, the BBT thermometer, pee cups, Preseed and after-sex pillow.  So, you know that this journey hasn’t been one fit for a Lifetime […]

  2. Great review! I will give it a whirl :0)

  3. […] daisy on Monday.  We were so tired, and somewhat drunk, after the party – thank goodness for PreSeed!  Wham, Bam, Goodnight […]

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