Two Good Eggs

Two cracked eggs find the sunnyside (and funny side) of trying to conceive

Signs you may be obsessed with TTC

on September 21, 2012
  • You have more pictures on your phone of squinter pee strips than you do of your husband.
  • You have checked for CM while driving your car.
  • You keep plastic cups and OPK strips in your purse.
  • Your boobs are felt up more in a 7-10 day span than they were throughout all your high school years.

    Your bathroom looks like a drug-testing lab.

  • “Chart” and “Test” are considered verbs.
  • Your fingers are in you more often than your husband’s.

You don’t know if that spot on your iPad is from Diet Coke or urine.  

  • You buy a new thermometer every month because clearly that’s the reason your temp reading isn’t high enough.
  • You speak in acronyms without realizing it.
  • You find yourself walking down the hall at work with your thighs pressed together.

  You can’t look at egg whites as a breakfast option.

  • You know the Dollar Tree employees by name, and they wish you good luck when you leave.
  • You chat with strangers online about your bodily fluids.

You take cough medicine and you’re not sick.

  • You have used OPK strips in your car cup holder.
  • You have an “after-sex pillow” on your floor, and you only wash it once a week.

     You’ve ever POAS in a public bathroom.

  • Your phone auto corrects normal words and changes them to OPK, DPO, HPT or TWW.
  • You refer to tampons as ” devil sticks.”

Ovulation is more celebrated than birthdays or holidays.  

  • You live your life by Cycle Days, not days of the month.
  • You block pregnant friends on Facebook.
  • You can predict a due date more quickly than an Ob/Gyn.

  Your husband grimaces any time you say, “Honey, come look at this.”

  • You have your Christmas card picked out based on whether or not you can announce your pregnancy at the same time.
  • You have used HPTs in your car console. Should rename them Car Pregnancy Tests.

You save all of your OPKs and HPTs in your bathroom drawer.  

  • You think you “feel” something, and run to the bathroom to check for fluid.
  • You argue more with your husband about who’s on top instead of who has the remote control.
  • Your first thought when someone announces they’re pregnant is, “Bitchass”

   The “F” in BFN can mean more than one thing.

  • Sex is a chore, and doing laundry is productive.
  • You congratulate (or thank) your partner when he can finish quickly.

You have already started a private baby registry online.  

  • You convince yourself the nausea is due to pregnancy, not the four frozen bean burritos you ate.
  • You can spot newly pregnant women with the skills of a sniper.

  You stopped getting manicures because your nails must remain short.

  • You walk through the baby section at stores “accidentally” all the time.
  • You wait to plan vacations a year from now because you might be pregnant when the time comes.

  You can quote HPT prices for the top 5 brands at stores in seven counties.

5 responses to “Signs you may be obsessed with TTC

  1. 1suburbanchic says:

    I am so guilty of a lot of these!

  2. Scrambled says:

    I may or may not be guilty of all of them. 😀

  3. […] You might be obsessed with TTC if you take your OPKs to the bathtub with you. […]

  4. […] I can’t partake in my usual TWW past-time – POAS every day from 8DPO – because I’ll get false positives due to the Ovidrel in my system.  […]

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